Can you spell "c-o-n-s-t-i-p-a-t-i-o-n"?

I recalled a funny thing that happened to me when I was in primary school. The teacher was asking how many of us had ever had constipation. Since I used to zone off really easily in class, I only heard the big word "constipation". I had absolutely no idea what constipation was but being the show-off that I was, I put up my hand with much zeal. I thought I could show everyone that I knew a big word. The entire class erupted in guffaws and even the teacher was trying not to laugh when he asked, "Melissa, you have constipation?" I quickly turned to a neighbour and asked what "constipation" meant, and upon receiving the answer, turned a bright tomato red and hurriedly said "NO". Lesson learnt - don't be a smart aleck.

Today, as I was walking to the MRT station after work, I went past a sundry shop and saw packets of shower caps with the label "head fashion". So, that's what people are wearing nowadays is it? I feel so unfashionable. Monday, I shall go to that shop and buy me a shower cap so I can wear it down Orchard Rd. So that's why I'm not getting enough dates... I'm not wearing "head fashion". Now I know. I'm glad my eyes were opened. Note to self: Buy shower cap. The one with the pink flowers.

I'm zoning out again. If you ask me whether I have constipation now, I'll put up my hand. That's what happens when my brain goes into screen saver mode. System alert: Your brain will automatically disconnect in 5... 4... 3... 2...*click*