The Nando's Guy

Yesterday, a guy wearing a Nando's shirt came to the counter to check in. It was really strange cos I was seeing something so familiar. I love Nando's chicken. Ok, so they're really skinny and stuff but I love their sauces and chips and spicy rice. So anyway, I checked him in, took his credit card and saw that it was a Nando's corporate card. Couldn't take it anymore, I had to ask. "Um, sir, do you work for Nando's?" He did. And I proceeded to tell him howwww much I looooove Nando's and he was so happy :) He said if he had any sauce with him, he'd have given me a bottle. But anyway, he needed to get something checked out and since it was already 10pm, I told him I'd call the office first thing in the morning. Which I did. Yes, I finished work at 11pm last night and was back at the hotel by 7am this morning. Mr Nando's was so thrilled about my help that he gave me a pair of Nando's socks!! How cool is that? And he let me choose too :) So there you go, I have a new friend from South Africa who works for Nando's. Brilliant :) Oh, for those who don't know what Nando's is, it's a chain that sells chicken and chips with their original sauces. I like :)

But other than Mr Nando's, I had a horrible day at work. Absolutely dreadful. So dreadful, in fact, that it's worthy of a :P

Mandy gave me a very thoughtful gift today in the form of a very belated birthday present :) She gave me a really groovy metal/steel (don't know what material it is exactly) namecard holder and said that by faith, at the end of the year, I'll have some use for it. I certainly hope so :)

3 days to go.

I want...

As my last day of work draws nearer, so my list of wants grows longer and the hole in my pocket, bigger. I was toying with the idea of giving tuition while on my internship so I wouldn't have to take money from my savings to support myself. I'm not sure I'll have the time or energy to do that though. But, as I was saying, my list of wants is growing longer. From a miserable "1", my wish list has grown to a respectable "2". Yes, I now have 2 things on my wish list. What? I'm easy to please!

The first thing isn't entirely a want. It's a need as well. My phone is dying. Both in species and function. It used to be cool carrying a phone as small as the Nokia 8210. Now, a phone that size ain't cool unless it's WAP-enabled, supports MMS, comes with colour screen, polyphonic ring tones, radio and camera. Heck, I'm happy as long as my phone has a dictionary! But I am in dire need of a new phone. It takes me 5 minutes to read an sms - one second to press the right button, 5 seconds to shake the phone vigourously and 4 mins and 54 secs to wait for the blank screen to reappear with my msg. My phone also does the matrix thing, you know, with funny characters running down the entire screen. It's possessed, I tell you.

The next item I want is a digital camera. I really really really want to take pictures. I pass by loads of interesting stuff everyday and I keep wishing I had a camera with me to capture the quirks of the day. I love taking pictures. Does anyone want to recommend a good, reliable, relatively inexpensive digital camera? I'm not considering a second-hand purchase. I'm not a second-hand person, not because I'm snobbish or anything. I think it's a youngest child thing. You know, as the younger kid, you get all the hand-me-downs, the old clothes that other people have grown out of, the old cot your elder sibling used to sleep in etc. After all that, you kinda lose yourself and your identity. I guess I grew up just wanting my own stuff. Stuff that belonged to ME and wasn't passed down through the generations. So yeah, if you know a good model at a good price, let me know.

And since my list has grown, I need to ensure that I am able to finance this list. Ok, any of your brothers or sisters need tuition? And er, I don't do Maths. Or Science. Or Chinese. Definitely not Chinese.

Charlie's Angels

I had an absolute ball of a time today at work. It was really quite funny cos us 3 girls were on shift today and of the 3 of us, 2 were pms-ing and one had slept only 1 hour the night before cos she was out clubbing. So you can imagine, it was quite a cranky crazy bunch at the counter today. We yelled at one another in mock irritation over small things and then burst into fits of laughter cos we were acting like little hooligans. None of us were actually angry with anyone but it was just fun pretending to be :) And we had fun scolding one another and going all bazookiebonkers :) Ball of a time, I tell ya. And so we became Charlie's Angels - the ditz, the smarts and the klutz. Of course, I was Alex, the smart one *ahem*. Heck, I haven't had such a good time at work ever.

One of my friends commented today that I'm really cute and funny and endearing and if she was a guy, she'd be attracted to me. Which got me worried. No, I wasn't questioning her sexual preferences but I was wondering if I'm attracting the wrong sex. Maybe only girls like me and I just mesh really well with the girls while I don't really have any chemistry with guys. Me and guys.. I dunno, maybe we just don't relate so well? I don't understand guys. But then again, they don't understand me. That's fair by my standards. Maybe that's why I've never been in a long-term relationship with a guy. I'd like to prove myself wrong though. I'd like to see something work out for once. But then it isn't about proving something, is it? The minute you try to prove something, love gets pushed out of the picture and you start striving. Darlene Zschech once said, "Don't strive. It's ugly".

So maybe I really do have more chemistry with girls. But ultimately, I still want a husband, not a wife ;) I'm as straight as an arrow, don't you worry :) And even though I've never been in a relationship that worked out, I'd still rather wait for the right guy than marry the wrong man. Definitely.

Girls' night outs are always fun. Joined Lil and her friends for a night out at Centro and I must say I enjoyed myself more than I expected to. She has friendly friends :) And I just discovered that I like One Fullerton quite a bit. It's romantic at night. It's not Paris but it's one of the best we've got. Sitting by the river having cake and taking in the breeze was really quite refreshing. And what I like about Centro is that it's got windows and a great view. Most clubs are just really dark and stuff but it was really nice looking out of the windows to see into the night. Ok, so I suppose the people who go there are more interested in other types of views but I really did enjoy looking outside :) And yeah, clubbing with Lil has taken our friendship to a new level :) Good thing you weren't banging your head against the pillar and the cute guy at the other table didn't have to haul me out ;)

Woke up this afternoon relatively dazed and had to go out to meet a friend for a movie. Was walking along the underground passage in Bugis and went past all the food shops and trinket shops and stuff and came by this stall selling dried fruits. My eye caught a box that said, Dates with Nuts. Gee, that certainly described very well some of the encounters I've had. *shudder*

Am really sleepy now. I've been having too much fun :)

I had a good day at work :) I've a new colleague who's my age and is really nice too, so it feels better going to work these days :)
By the way, I work here.

And now I have to sleep. I have crazy working hours...

Pepper

I've never been close to an animal. I mean, we've kept fish before but they always ended up dead for some reason. We'd usually find them floating upside down in the fish tank. Never was a good pet-owner I suppose. Today I found out that a dear little puppy got knocked down by a car. My first reaction was one of shock.

Pepper and I met when I went over to Perth last month. I'd heard about him and was eager to meet the little dog. He struck me as a really energetic, excitable, friendly puppy who never failed to make people laugh with his antics. Crystal and I took him out for walks and we laughed at his crab-like style of walking. It was really cute. You should have seen it.

Pepper made friends very easily, be it humans, cushions or other dogs. We had to tug really hard at his leash so he wouldn't do anything embarrassing to another dog. He was so hyperactive he used to jump on people all the time. I had a few scratches here and there as a result of his hyperactivity and every time I returned from his place, I smelled of dog and had dog hair on my clothes. It was nice :) Not in a strange way but in a sweet way.

I remember taking him out to the field where the guys were playing soccer. Pepper made a few friends with other dogs there. He tried running after the soccer ball too. Oh, and he had a strange habit of sniffing/tasting other dogs' poo. On the way back after soccer, I carried Pepper in the car. I'd never carried a dog in a car before :) It felt really nice. I felt close to him somehow.

Pepper's gone now. I'm glad I got to meet you when you were around, Pepper. You gave me moments of happiness and made me smile. Thank you for the times you listened when no one else was around to. Thank you for letting me talk about my problems and for sitting there patiently. You probably had no idea what I was talking about but thank you for being there anyway.

I will miss you, Pepper.
Love you lots,
Mel.

"She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs with no fear of the future. Prov. 31:25"

Listening to Avalon's Adonai. Making me very reflective and quiet. Feeling somewhat mellow. You know, like I've been wild and bursting with energy but am now subdued, tamed, calm and feeling all of 23 :) which is not that old :)

Got stuck with another midnight shift which will begin Friday. Just when I thought that was the end of midnight shifts for me. At least now I know what I want in a job. Or rather what I don't want. Unless the Lord calls me to a job with shifts, I will never again take one up. No hard feelings though. It just doesn't work for me :)

Standing at the brink of a new beginning is an amazing thing. So many times, we worry that we're not making it, that we're drowning or that we're not getting there fast enough. But it's the wrong kind of adrenaline. There IS more to life.

I'm excited about the future. Reminds me of Proverbs 31:25, one of my favourite verses of the whole Proverbs 31 passage - "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs with no fear of the future". How perfectly wonderful. You know, I don't want to worry about the future, about what to eat or drink. Perhaps it comes across as irresponsible. But I want to leave my future in the hands of the One who created it and who loves me amazingly. Incomprehensibly. Perfectly.

I know I don't say this quite enough, but I love You Lord. Dan, you asked me why I go to church every Sunday and why it's important to me. I guess that's why. I'm not the perfect example of a Christian. I'm so flawed. But He loves me anyway. I guess you could say He's my lifeline :)

I love You Lord.

Media Fever

So I've been unwittingly bitten by the media bug. Today's edition of The New Paper holds a quote from this blog. In all honesty, I was shocked that a search on the web for a certain topic would lead to my blog (amongst other sites of course) and the availability of this blog started to really hit me. I mean, someone in Zambia (with internet access of course) could be reading everything I'm writing. So could someone in Peru. Or Azerbaijan. Or New Zealand. The whole privacy issue came into play. But of course, when I chose to allow this blog to be public, I forfeited every right of privacy. But anyhow, to maintain whatever privacy I could still get my hands on, I chose to remain anonymous. I'm telling you guys because you've already read my thoughts on the SAR-vivor rap so reading it in The New Paper wouldn't make a difference. Thanks anyway to the journalists (and the sister of my friend ;))who asked for permission ;)

So what's next on the media agenda? Tomorrow, I'm supposed to attend a Courage Fund presentation thing - an event that will be televised. I've been told to be in full uniform (which effectively blows my cover). So much for not wanting more people to know what my job is. I have absolutely no idea what this presentation is about except that the hotel is officially donating the money that we've collected for the Courage Fund. Anyway, let's hope this is something that half of Singapore is attending and we'll all just be a speck on the screen :) In any case, I think it'll be fun and I won't have to be at work for a few hours! Hehe..

I'm getting increasingly excited about my internship. And I'm also learning that a lot of people don't have a clue about Women's Weekly. If you're in Singapore, this month's cover girl is Kelly Hu a.k.a Lady Deathstrike. Man, I've really got to go watch "How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days". I bet it'll be inspiring. And for those of you who haven't watched it, it's not because I want to learn how to lose a guy quick. I believe I'm qualified enough to write that article ;) It's because Kate Hudson's a magazine writer on assignment. How cool if I get an assignment like that!!

Heehee.

Hmm... I came across this ad at the bus stop today. Someone please tell me what it means:

Preserves colours while asian-type washing machines cause fading.

Asian-type washing machines?? So how about this: Hello, I'm Melissa. I'm an Asian-type girl. Have you met my laptop? It's an American-type computer. And you must have met my Swedish-type phone.

Oh well, I never knew Asian-type washing machines cause fading. Learnt something new today.

Caught up with Esther over dinner and coffee. Had a really really good time of sharing and was very encouraged. I'm glad I got out of the house today :) You know I always feel better after talking to you right? Always get lots of spiritual encouragement from you. Ever since the Flat 68 days :) So thanks Room 1. You made my day :)

And by the way, those of you who thought I wouldn't take my medicine, I finally did :)

A Rose By Any Other Name Is Still A Rose (AHEM!) :)

I have come to the conclusion that people will always get my name wrong. Early signs came in JC when my tutor called out "Pamela" and stared at me for the longest time, wondering why I didn't respond. When the real Pamela responded, my tutor stared at me in amazement and said I had such a "Pamela" face. I didn't know what to make of that comment.

Next up on the favourites list is the name Vanessa. Now this is a name that pastors favour. One of my pastors in Singapore called me that by mistake and so did dear Pastor Cheng Lai. Of course by now, Pastor Cheng Lai has learnt that I am not Vanessa but some funny variation of "Malaysia" :)

And speaking of Malaysia, someone came up to me at work yesterday and asked, "You are Malaysia right?". I took a quick glance down to see if I was wearing my name tag (or if I was wearing the wrong one) and then looked up and nodded. I'd given up. I respond to "Malaysia" and "Muhleeeza" now. Yes, I have a colleague who actually calls me Muhleeeza (emphasis is on the "eee").

But the all-time favourite name I've been called is.... MICHELLE!!! A colleague came into the room the other day and went, "Michelle, do you know if there's a colour printer here?" I looked at her for a while, waiting for her to realise her mistake, then gave up and pointed her to the colour printer. A few seconds later, she started laughing in embarrassment and went, "oh sorry, it's 'Melissa' right?", to which I laughed along and said, "YES". After she was done with the printer, she got up to leave and went, "Thanks Michelle".

The number of times I've been called Michelle is unbelievable. Recounting every single incident would take too much time. I used to wonder why people would call me Michelle instead of Melissa. It's like a global conspiracy. But I've come to accept it. Michelle is fine. Vanessa is fine. Pamela is fine. It grates my nerves though, when people call me Malaysia. I'm not that big ok!

Oh, and if you want a tip on what to call me, I'd say "Your royal highness" is rather pleasing to the ear ;)

The Hospital

Almost didn't make it to the doctor today. Was kinda tired after work and felt really tempted to just go home. But I guess I was serious enough about my health not to procrastinate. And I'm glad I went cos my mind's at peace. It was nothing serious but stress was one of the factors that caused the problem. Anyway, I've been given medication and will monitor myself for 3 days. The visit to the doctor's was quite an experience though. I had my temperature taken Three times - once before I entered the clinic and twice in the waiting area. The staff at Raffles Hospital were very polite though, very courteous and always "Miss" this, "Miss" that. I guess you come to expect a certain standard from private hospitals but they almost surpassed my standards (I have high service standards).

Following my temperature check, I was given a mask to wear. *groan*. So being the good girl I am, I put it on reluctantly. It's one of those you have to tie around your head. But after half a minute of not being able to breathe through the mask and the breathing fogging up my glasses, I decided I'd had enough and chucked the mask. After waiting an eternity, I finally got to see the doctor. I shan't reveal what happened behind those doors but a chaperone was required. I've never before had any examination done to me that required a chaperone. Even when I was doing my full medical for my Australian visa. But then again, that doctor was female. So anyhow, he did what he had to do, made his diagnosis and we had a few laughs about my condition and medication. Did I mention I thought he was cute? ;) All hopes were dashed when he left the clinic and the nurse called out to him that she'd like to see his baby some time. Darn.

So that's what happened today. Oh, and we got caught skiving from housekeeping duties. LOL. I'm pooped now. Whoever invented skirtings, wallpaper and duvet covers ought to be shot.

I'm ok. I will be seeing the doctor tomorrow. I promise :) Thanks, those of you who msged me. Your concern is much appreciated. :) I'm sorry for giving you a scare yesterday Paul. Thanks for hanging around in case I keeled over and fainted :)

I had a really bad day today. I wish I had something nice to blog about but the truth is, I had a really bad day. But that's ok. Because once today is over, things will be better :)

You know what? I've come to a point where I recognise regular hotel guests and they recognise me too. It's really cool when they call out to you and give you a wave. Little things like these make my job worth doing :) And in retrospect, I think I will miss this job. I mean it's got crappy working hours and you have to take a lot of nonsense from guests but at the end of the day, it can be quite satisfying. Today though, there was a really really rude Singaporean (were you expecting anything else?) who wasn't even a guest. He started yelling (and I mean YELLING) at me and every time he yelled, he used my name. The counter was really busy and I was trying my best to help him but he made such a ruckus that my patience finally wore out and I got pissed. I mean, I got really pissed. I glared at him and as I calmly tried to kick some sense into him, I went into some sort of Ally McBeal trance where she's staring at someone but thinking something else altogether. So there I was, explaining that I WAS assisting him but in my mind, I was actually hitching up my skirt, climbing over the counter and wringing his chicken neck. Man, that guy really tried my patience. And then he started yelling at everyone else at the counter. What a jerk. He epitomises "jerk". And it was incredibly irritating that he kept using my name. I was on the verge of, "Don't 'Melissa' me, you horrible man!"

Anyway, tomorrow will be better. I am counting down to the number of days I have left in the hotel. I want to go on a holiday to Vienna. Europe would be a nice change from Singapore and Australia.

Alrighty, looking forward to tomorrow.

It happened again. I'm getting scared now. Lil, I promised you I'd see a doctor if it happened again and it has. I'll go to the doctor on Monday. What's even scarier is that I experienced almost severe abdominal pains today and I have a strange feeling it has something to do with the problem. Lil, I'm scared. Please keep me in your prayers, everyone. I'm scared. I really am. And because of the embarrassing nature of the problem (actually it's not that embarrassing), I'm not gonna talk about it here but please, please keep me in prayer...

So my almost perfect day was ruined. But I shall talk about my almost perfect day anyway. Met up with Ruth and Nicole for lunch and had a really great time catching up and sharing. It's nice to share with people who are in the same stage of life as yourself. After that, met Paul for tea and dinner and finally managed to tell him what I'd been meaning to tell him for so long :) I had a really good day of talking and sharing but it unfortunately ended in pain. But I'm ok now. Was ok after getting some food in my system.

Lately, people have been telling me that I'm losing weight and I'm actually getting worried. Unlike many girls, I don't have the desire to be stick thin. Nor do I enjoy dieting. I'll admit that the size of my wrists is starting to worry me. My thumb and middle finger can still meet more than halfway up my forearm. And it's not funny. I'm getting skinnier and I don't know why.

Suddenly, I feel like a dark cloud is hovering above me. And I can't push it away.

"I am amazed and know not what to say" Part 2

Ok, so I was walking around Bugis after work today and made a quick trip to Watsons to get shampoo. While in the store, I browsed around and walked to the sections with all the facial masks (cos you know, I think I need a little sumthin' sumthin' to bring an incandescent glow to my face). And right there in front of me was a really interesting mask with orange essence. So I thought, hmm... potential purchase. Let's investigate. So I pick the packet up, turn it around and to my horror and amusement, read the following:

Natural fruit protection essence permeates horny layer of skin.

Ohh-kaay. I've never heard my skin described that way before. For all you know, it may be some profound dermatological term only the professionals understand. In any case, I put the dodgy thing back before anyone else saw me.

Well, in more serious news, today I told my boss that I would be tendering my resignation soon. Then somewhere in my conversation with him, I went on a guilt trip and felt bad for leaving, for having wasted their time etc. But I knew, and I know, that if I didn't take this internship, I would regret it for the rest of my life.

So yeah, I'm pretty happy with the way things are now. Looking forward to the few days off I have before I start in my new environment. I might head to the spa :) In fact, that sounds like a very good idea. Shan't bore everyone with the details of my resignation. Ask me if you want to know.

Have a really groovy day everyone ;)

"I am amazed and know not what to say" - A Midsummer Night's Dream

Our latest national faux pas is this - the SAR-vivor rap. I'm not kidding. There's a rap called the SAR-vivor rap. On TV. And world-famous celebrities are performing it. World-famous celebrities like PHUA CHU KANG and ANDREA DE CRUZ. Don't laugh. They ARE world-famous. Why? Because Phua got international recognition on The Amazing Race and de Cruz got hers on CNN and wherever else because of her romantic near-death-brave-girl-sacrificial-boyfriend-love-story. I am annoyed. For a few reasons.

Firstly, what were they thinking??? The SAR-vivor RAP??? I cannot believe that when the first nitwit suggested it, the entire boardroom would clap their hands in agreement and think, "My, my, how witty! What a great play on words! SAR-vivor as in SUR-vivor? How clever!! Yay!". And of all things, a rap. Look, you are not black. Neither are you Eminem. Leave the rapping to the pros.

Secondly, I fail to see how a cute little rap will take away all the pain and sorrow of those left emotionally scarred by the disease. I mean, c'mon. We're all trying to put the whole SARS thing behind us and you want to drum it into our brains with a pseudo-rap? Please. Spare a thought for those who'd rather not think about how their lives were destroyed by the disease.

Thirdly (and this must be the most puzzling question), what is Phua Chu Kang doing there??? You want Gurmit Singh to rap, fine. He's a household name, everyone lurves Gurmit, ok, we get the picture. But to use his screen persona - a construction worker - in such a situation is highly dubious. Ok, so I suppose it's more understandable that Andrea de Cruz is part of it. After all, ever since she nearly died, she's been some sort of spokesperson for all sorts of sickness. We should just make her National Health Ambassador.

Am I starting to sound bitchy? I really don't mean to. It's just that this whole thing just blows my mind. I just can't believe that anyone with an ounce of intelligence would let this by the censors. And yes, it should be censored! The whole thing should be censored! It's dangerous for little children, lest they think all adults are idiots and that they'll grow up to be idiots too.

But sigh, who am I kidding? This is not the first faux pas we've made. And it will not be the last. Mark my words. Oh, did you also know there's a "PLAY" campaign going on? All Singaporeans are encouraged to go out and play. My dad thinks it's ridiculous that we need a campaign to tell us to go play. I agree. Did you also know that we are the country with the most number of campaigns? In the world? I know this cos I did an essay on it once.

So yeah.. I'm not angry about the whole thing. I'm just really bewildered. And bordering on amused. Let's see what the campaign-makers will come up with next.

I'm crossing my fingers.

So I think I'm on the path to what I might want to do. I don't have high hopes of getting a permanent position with the magazine once my internship is over but I am looking forward to the internship. I'm very excited in fact :) You know, I'm really happy I got the internship and all but my dad doesn't seem too psyched up. I think it's because he thinks women's magazines are trashy toilet-reading material. Or maybe he's wondering how long it will be before he can stop supporting me financially. But the truth is, I don't take any money from him at all. Or maybe he's wondering how long it will take me to sort my life out and figure out what I want to do. I think he was hoping for more from me. Maybe he wanted me to be a high-powered executive. I don't know. But I do know that I'm extremely grateful for this opportunity and I'm going to enjoy it. Hey, how often do you get to work for free? ;)

Anyway, I thought I owed it to all of you to let you know how it went. Cos, you know, you guys have been so completely supportive. By the way, you must have noticed that I cut my hair :) well, those of you who know me anyway :) one of my friends is calling me "bob head" - which I think is hilarious! :) And he also commented that he can now call me "pretty face". Which makes me wonder what he would have called me before. And that was in relation to the fact that I'm swapping my glasses for contacts. But now that I've got contacts, I think women who wear glasses are really sexy (as warmsocks will tell you!). See, I told you I'm confused. Uh, did I tell you I was confused before? Anyway, if I didn't, I'm telling you now - I'm confused :) So aaaanyway, here's a really funny photo of me that I found. Ok, so maybe it's not funny but it's really ugly!! When I first saw it, I was like, "eeeeeeee!!!". But hey, we need to learn to laugh at ourselves huh :) This was CZ Games Day in Perth, 2002:



Argh.. I'm getting nostalgic again...

Just The Way You Are

I wish I had this cd when I was in Perth. Then I could play it in the car and cruise down the roads (you can't "cruise" in Singapore). Thanks again Cheryl :) Because I have nothing to blog about (you know how in primary school, they always taught you not to start your sentences with "because"? Because "because" is a conjunction and you can't use a conjunction at the beginning of a sentence? Because they assume that if you use "because" at the beginning of a sentence, you aren't going to follow up with another phrase. But the thing is that you CAN use "because" at the beginning of a sentence. You just have to have another phrase that allows for a connection. You know what I mean.), I shall give you the lyrics of my song-of-the-moment. I love this song. I absolutely do. And before anybody draws any funny conclusions about who I'm addressing this song to, let me clarify that I'm NOT directing this song at anyone. I just like it a lot and I think it's a really honest song. And I agree with it :)

Just The Way You Are (Billy Joel)

Don't go changing, trying to please me
You never let me down before
I don't imagine you're too familiar
And I don't see you anymore
I would not leave you in times of trouble
We never could have come this far
I took the good times, I'll take the bad times
I'll take you just the way you are

Don't go trying some new fashion
Don't change the colour of your hair
You always have my unspoken passion
Although I might not seem to care
I don't want clever conversation
I never want to work that hard
I just want someone that I can talk to
I want you just the way you are

I need to know that you will always be
The same old someone that I knew
What will it take till you believe in me
The way that I believe in you

I said I love you and that's forever
And this I promise from my heart
I could not love you any better
I love you just the way you are.

Ok, now go listen to the song!! Go!

I was inspired (ok, maybe that's not really the right word) by Liz's last 2 posts about getting over someone and I thought I'd give my 2 cents' worth. Ok, so I'm no relationship guru and I'm probably not the best person to be talking about this but I guess I just want to say my piece. Sigh. Deep breath, here goes...

I think getting over someone is easy. If that someone didn't mean anything to you. It gets a leeetle tricky if they meant something. If they meant a whole lot. But that's ok. It's not the end of the world. Because solace can always be found in chocolate ice cream!!! In fact, I'm digging my spoon into a tub right now! Chocolate is your best friend in times of extreme pain and sorrow. You know those nights when you can't sleep? When you're too tired to cry yourself to sleep again? Close your eyes and imagine a rich, dark cascading chocolate waterfall. And then if you have to go pee, GO.

Bottom line - we're all gonna get our hearts broken one time or another. I guess some just get more broken than others. Some just hurt more. Some will cry more. At the end of the day, it's not how much he/she hurt you. It's how much you want to bounce back and carry on with life. Allow yourself a grieving period (ie. the one where you bitch about how badly he/she hurt you, what a big fat idiot he/she is, how you'd like to smack him/her in the face, how you'd like to substitute their toothpaste with a tube of glue...) and then get on with your life. And yes, I know, those stupid memories with that warm, rosy glow (ie. the lens they use to shoot soap operas with) will do the naughty thing and come back to gnaw at you just when you think you're making some progress. I say the best thing to do is to ignore them. Ignore the fond memories. Cherishing them comes at a later stage. When you're well and truly over the person who let you go in the first place. But don't be surprised if one day, you find that the memories have become fuzzy and you don't really remember much about the time you spent with the person. It happens. If your memories are still crystal clear, you either have a complex and profound brain, or you're not really over the person. Which means it's time to get out the spoon and the chocolate ice cream again. And that's ok. Because chocolate is good-for-you. Repeat after me - CHOC-O-LATE EEES GOOOD FOR YOOOOOU.

So there you go - my 2 cents' worth. I could probably use some of my own advice. I'm trying to be a brave girl. I really am. I shall leave you, my readers, with some words from Ms Diva herself - Ms Mariah Carey. Here's a good song to listen to after a break up. Especially good if you're blasting it in a car, and singing it at the top of your lungs with 2 other gal pals. I learnt the chorus in the car. We screamed pretty loud. Uh, I mean, "sang" ;)

I can make it through the rain
I can stand up once again
On my own, and I know
That I'm strong enough to mend
And every time I feel this way
I hold tight onto my faith
And I live one more day
And I know
I can make it through the rain

I did it. I got contacts.

So what happened today? It was a pretty normal day. Was bombarded with smses and calls in the morning by people who love me :) Not saying that those of you who didn't don't love me ok... :) Met up with Cheryl for a movie and tea/dinner. And since she had her trusty camera with her, we took some pics :) Let's begin with a candid shot of me smsing someone:


Aiyah, call me lah. I hate smsing...


This is a brownie.


Me and Book. No, that's not my present.


This is (A compilation of 15 songs to, I quote, "inspire, encourage and empower". Thank yeeew Chair-eel :)).


Me and Pleety Laydee.

Following my arvo with Cheryl, I went for dinner at Brewerkz, a Singapore equivalent of Little Creatures in Freo. Now, having tea/dinner with Cheryl before dinner with the family wasn't exactly smart. All I had was a plate of portabello mushrooms and a glass of wine. NEVER undermine the humble portabello. By the time I went for dinner proper, I was quite full. Dinner for me was a steak and a mug of beer. What's a birthday without alcohol right? ;) Anyway, I've confirmed that I'm not a beer person. Give me wine anytime. Beer is icky.

So yeah, I had quite a good day :)

Birthday Girl

Ladies and Gentlemen, I turn 23 today. And as you turn a year older, you undoubtedly have the urge to look back on your life achievements. So I look back. And the view that greets me is one of an empty space save a few pieces of paper. 4, to be exact. And each piece of paper costs more than the one before. And suddenly, my life is in danger of being turned into a case study for cost-benefit analysis.

But I look ahead of me. And I see that it, too, is an empty space. And I realise that I can use my crayon, my ballpoint, my fountain pen, my colour pencil, my marker... I can use any of these, or all of them, to fill in the space. And it's entirely up to me. And I smile. Oh yeah, we're gonna have some fun! ;)

So here's to writing our own stories, living our own dreams and finding the happiness we were meant to have.

Cheers.

Thanks :)

Hey, I just wanted to say thanks guys. For being so supportive. It's another step for me and I guess I'm kinda feeling a little nervous. I mean, I don't relish the thought of going for interviews but I know it's gotta be done. Otherwise, how will my future employer know what he/she's missing out on if he/she doesn't hire me? Right? Right? :)Man, I'm such a wimp. I'm freaking out over an interview. Well, it's not really an interview. She asked me for a chat. But I guess it's kinda like an interview right? Ok, so for those of you who haven't been updated, I've been asked to have a chat with one of the editors for a women's magazine (shan't name the magazine here but I'll tell if you ask me personally ;)) on the possiblity of an internship. I'm really hoping it'll happen. And I have to say I got the idea from you guys who've been leaving messages in my guestbook, telling me you enjoy reading my blog :) I think this might actually be something I would enjoy. I might make a career out of it. Who knows.

But yeah, I just wanted to thank all of you for telling me to go for it and all. Feels good to have people backing you up :) Ok, so keep me in your thoughts for Monday. *Fingers crossed*

Wedding Bells

A dear friend of mine is getting married and I've been invited (To Miss Melissa Kong and Guest). Unfortunately, I will have to give the wedding a miss. Because it's in Indiana. Yes, the States. I did think about going though. I mean, I could use a holiday in a totally different environment just to get away from it all and to share in my friend's special day. It's not like missing out on her birthday you know. There'll be other birthdays to come. There won't be other weddings to come though. Well I hope not anyway. So it's with much regret that I'll have to give her a negative RSVP. I'm sorry Amy. I really really really really really wanted to go : (

So last night, I was thinking about the wedding and I decided to write her a song as a gift. I didn't think it would be hard. I thought I'd write about what she means to him and what he means to her and the gift they are to each other (I blame this on Steven Curtis Chapman). And that's when it got hard. Considering current personal circumstances, it's difficult to write a song like that. And so I tried. And I realised that I wasn't as affected as I thought I'd be. And that's when I realised I was probably learning to move along. The pause button on my life had been released.

So I did it. I wrote the song.

But seriously....

The question on my mind at the moment is - should I explore the possibility of doing what I might actually enjoy doing at the expense of 2 months' pay and possibly doing the whole job search thing again after 2 months. I think I would really enjoy it though. Writing, that is. For a magazine. But I can't shrug off that nagging thought at the back of my mind that some people might think it's yet another career move blunder on my part (since I know many already think the job I'm in is a classic career blunder in itself). You know, I look around at the people I know and they're all doing so well. I don't care about earning big bucks and that concerns me. Because I wonder if it's irresponsible of me to take my time to figure out what I want to do and not start earning money to support myself. Is it irresponsible to quit a job I'm not happy in, that doesn't pay well, that is not what I want to do; and go for an internship which pays nothing and may be an area I want to go into?

The Bohemian in me says: Go for it. Go with your heart. Take your time. Discover yourself. Relax. Go at your own pace. Don't compare yourself with others. Don't bother about what other people think. Express yourself. Be free. You're still young.

The Singaporean in me says: Other people your age are already settled in good jobs. How much is in your bank? You want to take money from your parents forever? What are you doing with your life? You're so indecisive. You're not getting any younger.

The Aussie in me says: I've been to cities that never close down/From New York to Rome and old London town/But no matter how far or how wide I roam/I still call Australia hoooome....

The Couch potato in me says: Hey, there's Friends on tonight!

The Party gal in me says: Ok, I'm meeting Audrey tomorrow, the girls on wednesday night and Cheryl for margaritas sometime this week.

The Housewife in me says: Hmm... I need to do my laundry. I hate doing laundry. Why do I always have to do laundry. I need to buy more clothes so I don't need to do laundry all the time. Let's look for Party gal and go shopping.

Oh, I am such a confused young lady.... Oh, woe is me.... *hands in the air*

Hahaha... sometimes, we all just need to chill out :)

Shaken, not stirred

Must not gripe about work. Must not gripe about work. *mmmfffpp..*

I was in the car today and we were at the traffic lights when this motorcycle pulled up in the next lane, about half a car in front of us. I'm happily minding my own business (well, not too happily because I was upset about leaving work only at 8am... a whole hour after my shift ended) when the girl riding pillion calmly turns her head towards our side and proceeds to expel the contents of her stomach. And I saw the whole thing. The steady torrent of semi-solid gunk that the poor driver of the car behind would have to drive over. I hope he gets new tyres. And so I'm disgusted. Utterly grossed out. I mean, what was she thinking??? She was probably dead drunk from late night-early morning drink parties, in which case I have no sympathy for her. I've never been able to grasp the thrill of drinking till you puke. I mean, is there something I'm missing here? Drink Drink Drink Drink Drink Wobble Wobble Puke Puke. Shouldn't you be ENJOYING your drink and not expelling it in the next few hours? I dunno man... maybe I'm a prude. Hahaha..

There's a strange insect-bite-looking bruise on my ankle. And as a result of my refusal to apply anything on it, it's now got more swollen and hurts when I walk. I mean, where in the world did I get that insect-bite-looking bruise??

I slept from 9am to 4pm straight. I think my body's getting adjusted. And tonight happens to be my LAST midnight shift. ARGH! And then I'll have to adjust my sleep cycle back again!! Murphy's Law is hard at work I tell ya. Oh Murphy...